> Advice articles > From a date to a relationship > I wanted to take things slowly, now I haven't heard from him

From a date to a relationship

I wanted to take things slowly, now I haven't heard from him

I wanted to take things slowly, now I haven't heard from him

Dr Paula,

I met this guy last weekend and we had a really nice first date. I saw him again a couple of days ago and he wanted to take things further but I didn’t (we had discussed previously how we both thought it was important to take things slowly and not have sex too soon). He was very apologetic but he hasn’t been in touch since although I’ve sent him a couple of texts and now I think that maybe I ruined everything. Peter Susan

Dear Peter

You haven’t ruined things –it just wasn’t meant to be. If this guy was really into you he would have been able to wait a lot longer than the second date to have sex with you. Even if you had slept with him the result would have been the same sooner or later, and you would only have felt worse for it. When it comes to sex, it’s important that you do whatever feels right for you rather than let someone else dictate the pace. Best Wishes, Paula

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